You’ve arrived at the
FUTURE
HOOMAN
multi-universal CLINIC FOR BIOLOGICAL UPGRADES AND IFLU INNOCULATION
are you suffering from:
Over hydrated thought patterns * .0023% askew thought projection rates * Increased tendency to worship small domestic felines * Decreased tendencies to decrease tendencies * Inexplicable neural symmetry * Avatar incompatibility syndrome * Radical re-inclusion of natural behaviors * Deionized cavities * Immediately followed by Reionized cavities * SOTA disillusionment * Cyber impotence * Middle child syndrome as an only child * Drastic reduction in digital peer review * Inability to emoji…
you may be infected with
a cross-universal illness
that can destroy your technological abilities
and render you incapable of interdimensional travel!
Future Hooman can help. Our clinic, sponsored by PHAX (Pandimensional Health Alliance Exchange, Inc.), and brought to you by FHEELS (Future Hoomans Ensuring Existential Longevity) is here to innoculate you from the dangers that iFlu poses, or cure you if you’re already infected!
With experiences like the Department of Perception Adjustments to re-align your ocular synapses, Mind Meld to bring your inner world online, Dr. Toofio’s Take a Bite out of Health Initiative, and many, many more YOU can come out on the other side a renewed Hooman.
How can the clinic help you?
Corporate Events
Give your team a break from the usual meeting room. Our immersive space helps people connect and problem-solve through hands-on art, playful puzzles, and unexpected moments of wonder.
Art Rx
We all need a prescription for more creativity in our lives. COMING SOON our immersive art, puzzles, and hidden lore will be open to the public, and you can get your dose of imagination.
Private Parties
Perfect for birthdays and celebrations of all kind! Our lounge can shift from cozy hangout to lively dance floor, with interactive art rooms ready for guests who want a little extra adventure.
Contact Us
Have questions or want to plan something with us? We’ll help you build an experience that stands out and gives your group something to talk about.